Fill these spaces up with days
In my room
you can go you can stay
I can't sleep,
I can't speak to you
I can't sleep

Now these years locked in my drawer
I'll open to see just to be sure

I can't sleep,
I can't speak to you
I can't sleep

And So I'm reaching out for the one
And So I've learned the meaning of the sun
And all this like a message comes to shift my point of view
And watching it pull my own light as it tips a shade of you

Hold my wine hold it in
no bodys lost
but no body wins

And I can't sleep
I can't speak to you
I can't sleep

And So I'm reaching out for the one
And So I've learned the meaning of the sun
And All this like a message to shift my point of view
I'm watching through my own light as it turns the shade of you

I can't sleep
I can't speak to you
I can't sleep
I can't speak to you
I can't sleep

notes..

I just found these words I wrote long ago in a coat pocket:

"Though all my days are black and white now
and nights are still hard to get through,
I still wanna hit the road and see,
this world that I'm gonna leave soon" - 30.08.09

"If we're doin' the same thing at this exacly same time... baby, why aren't we doin' this together? (i miss you)" - 03.09.09

"Super amazing and fuckin' stupid (well, I think I am both...)" - 23.09.09

Each day brings me hope, but every night takes it away.

Maybe I should no longer believe in happy endings and once for all, just wish for an ending.

Tudo bem.

Enquanto o resto mundo dorme,

eu fico aqui sonhando..

Insonia terrível...

(amanhã será um longo, longo, looooooongo dia)

Secrets

My secrets are goin' to kill me someday. That's a fact I already learned to accept. I just hope they remain being secrets afterwords..

It's not good, it's not bad.. It just is.

Sometimes I feel like I've been everywhere, I've done everything and I've met everyone.. but what did I learn?

I feel like I'm walking in circles again..

a new consternation

I reveal different parts of myself to different people. NO ONE knows me whole.

I wish I knew why..

Momento filosófico de domingo: Querer bem a quem te fez mal é sinal de maturidade ou insanidade? Hmm.. na dúvida, fico com a segunda opção.

Imnsonia. Goin' out for another night drive..! =D

"If it makes you less sad, I will die by your hand. I hope you find out what you want. I already know what I am. And if it makes you less sad, we'll start talking again. And you can tell me how vile I already know that I am. I'll grow old and start acting my age. I'll be a brand new day in a life that you hate. A crown of gold. A heart that's harder than stone. And it hurts a whole lot, but it's missed when it's gone. Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not. I'm glad that you can forgive. I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget. If it makes you less sad, I'll move out of the state. You can keep to yourself. I'll keep out of your way. And if it makes you less sad, I'll take your pictures all down. Every picture you paint, I will paint myself out. It's cold as a tomb, and it's dark in your room, when I sneak to your bed to pour salt in your wounds. So call it quits or get a grip. Say you wanted a solution. You just wanted to be missed. Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not. I'm glad that you can forgive. I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget... You are calm and reposed. Let your beauty unfold. Pale white, like the skin stretched over your bones. Spring keeps you ever close. You are second hand smoke. You are so fragile and thin. Standing trial for your sins. Holding onto yourself the best you can. You are the smell before rain. You are the blood in my veins. Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not. I'm glad that you can forgive. I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget."

(♫)

181 canais em preto e branco!!!

Damn it.

Léo 1 x mosca 0

Lalalalala

I think I met someone.. :)

Back to Black

I hate the person I become when I'm not in love. That's a fact.

Depressão-pós-sábado

Cansei. A ressaca passou. Para onde vou agora? Praia? Shopping? Italia..?

The New Year

I wrote a very large post, tellin' everything that has happened since my last entry.. I mean, that was almost 2 years ago man, so yeah, it was a REALLY big ass post. For some reason, it got suspiciously deleted and I'm really pissed off right now. I mean, I spent almost one hour writing it out, remembering things that are painful to me and trying to make them fit in real small sentences as much I as could... for what.. it just got erased!!! Damn it blogger, now I know why I always quit this shit..

dAY-oFF

Yesterday I went to a snooker bar with my BF and friends, I don't play at all but it ended up being fun :) Today's my day off and I never know what to do with myself, since that's always on a wednesday and everybody I know is quite busy working, studying or both. So I try to enjoy my free time and rest, but it never works. I'm used waking up early so I can't really sleep much longer..

PS. Got this bad feeling goin' on again..

The Dudes

We had a black-out yesterday.. and it was fun!!
I love it here.

Haven't been giving much attention to this stupid-stupid blog, huh? Tell me about it.. a lot has happened since last time I stopped by, but I don't feel like writing about it right now, instead, I'll just list the biggest (or at least what I consider the biggest) news:

1-Got a Job!
I've been working as a bilingual receptionist in an hotel since March. The money is not great, but it pays off my bills and my rent, anyway. I'm still looking for a better position (and better salary of course!), but for now it's okay.. The hotel is located in downtown and it's not really far from my apartment, I ride the bus everyday to work and it's pretty ponctual and fast, at least the ones I take anyway.

2-Got a Boyfriend!
2 weeks after we broke up we got back together and everything is goin' great since then. This is a really long and complicated relationship story (all the way back from Canada, if I might say), but I kinda like it that way.. I guess it makes everything more intense (and interesting!).

3- Met a LOT of people.. and went to bunch of parties! :)

4-Got a Cooking Book..!
Yeah, that's right. I know I suck at cooking, but this is past now! hahahaha I already made a couple of dessert recipes and even a real mean, I mean, an actual people-approved-dinner! hahahaha I have some plans of cooking for money, maybe just pies and cakes, I don't know yet. Let's see how it goes..!

Cya soon!

Home Sweet Home

I should have written something here before, but everytime I tried I just got distracted by something else.. So I moved in. That was 2 nights ago.. My roomie went to her hometown for the weekend and I've got the apartment for myself. It's not fun, actually. I feel so damn lonely in this city that I end up spending my hours cleaning or organizing stuff. It's that or thinking of 'him' over and over and over again.. But there's a bright side, as you can imagine, the apartment looks probably cleaner now! =P

Found THE Apartment!!

Ironicly, it's right beside 'his'. And actually, that bothered me so much that I kept looking for an apartment, even after I thought this one was perfect! No complaints.. chattin' with strangers is kinda cool anyway! =D

So, that's it! I'm moving in next friday!! :)
Awesome!!

It's rainning outside

I feel strangely good right now.. Nice.

Busy Mind?

I just realized I've eaten NOTHING at all in the past couple of days.. seriously, how can someone forget to eat??

No shit this is an island..

I saw him twice today.

Grazed Knees

I'm trying not to stare, it's too late
The blankets over there, if you like
I'm broken and I'm colder than hell
I should've said I'd not come back here

Your breakfast will get cold
I really have to go

It's easier to lie and be safe
Time and time again I'm half stalled
One giant leap of faith is easy
When everyone you ask is so sure

Just give a second thought
What if we don't get caught

Just say you love me now
And forget this whole row
Just save your energy
For making up with me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zI3vpQBK4oc

On My Own

Woke up at 8am to check an apartment.
How far would be far enough..?
........................................
....................

I can't think.

Calling Out

Two weeks ago I packed my car and hit the road!
The reason: I finally made up my mind and moved out from my parents house (straight to Florianopolis). I couch surfed for a while in my boyfriend's (ops, ex-boyfriend) apartment. It was fun at first, but as expected,that didn't quite went well and I had to move out. Just to add more to the 'drama', worths to say that I'm currently homeless and unemployed too.. I know, I know, what a brilliant start!

It will get better.. but right now, this really fuckin' SUCKS!!